homeofthebudds

"...nudging the human race one millimeter farther along its path back to God."

Every year Imago (our church) has an "Arts Retreat". It's a weekend at a little conference center with silly excuses for beds, beautiful views and the most amazing food ever. No lie. The first meal I ate there included beets. Beets. And I tried to ask for seconds. After eating beets. Well, I wanted to ask for seconds, but that's obviously not proper behavior at a fancy restaurant that can make things like beets delicious.

That was a couple years ago. I went hoping it would bring me some clarity on this weird concept of the artistic life that I was becoming interested in. I really liked doing arty things, but it felt a little selfish to me. A little like I was spending my time frivoslously - shouldn't I be doing some laundry or making dinner or having a menaingful discussion with one of the kidlets or buying someone some new socks with that money I just spent on paintbrushes?

I don't mean to come off like all my thoughts were pure and others motivated. I've spent plenty of money on things I, and only I wanted. Have you seen my fabric stash? But for the first time I was thinking about creating a job, a career from one of these artistic pursuits. And that required spending real money. More than my weekly allowance combined with Joann's coupons could provide. And so I started wondering if this whole Art thing was really valid. So I signed up for the retreat.

I was not disappointed. Every one of the artist's giving their lectures, or sharing their work and thoughts addressed my concerns and brought me clarity and purpose. It was, truly, amazing. 

Last year I didn't even think about going cause I had a three month old infant. This year I picked up the information about it from the church lobby and realized that we had homework assigned before the reatreat. We were to address the questions of the artist's role in the church and the community through our medium.

Uggh. I hate homework. I'd love to see what everyone else comes up with. I'd love to hear what they think, but I don't want to have to come up with something. On my own?!? Ugh. 

For various other noble reasons I decided this was not a good year for me to go.

And then, yesterday while reading The War of Art (Steven Pressfield) I came upon this:

 

Are you a born writer? Were you put on earth to be a painter, a scientist, an apostle of peace? In the end the question can only be answered by action.

Do it or don't do it.

It may help to think of it this way. If you were meant to cure cancer or write a symphony or crack cold fusion and you don't do it, you not only hurt yourself, even destroy yourself. You hurt your children. You hurt me. You hurt the planet.

You shame the angels who watch over you and you spite the Almighty, who created you and only you with your unique gifts, for the sole purpose of nudging the human race one millimeter farther along its path back to God.

Creative work is not a selfish act or a bid for attention on the part of the actor. It's a gift to the world and every being in it. Don't cheat us of your contribution. Give us what you've got.

 

I read that and I thought "Ah! There it is. That's it." I'm still not going on the retreat this year (seriously, I have good and noble reasons) but if I were I'd start working out of this quote. I have no idea what I'd do, but whatever it was, these words would be cycling through my brain, on repeat until there was something to show that had become right.

 

Begin it now.

I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe's couplets:

"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.

Boldness has genius, magic and power in it. 

Begin it now."

-W.H.Murray, The Scottish Himalyan Expedition, from The War of Art, Steven Pressfield

Joelbaby: the haps

Joel is super into light switches lately. If he notices one, he simply must turn it off and on. And off and on.

He loves reading books. His current favorites From Head to Toe by Eric Carle and Pat the Bunny, but really, he likes every colorful book that he can reach.

His favorite food appears to be a peanut butter and honey sandwich, followed closely by dry cereal, string cheese and fruit leathers. 

He enjoys exploring the cupboards, the kids room and the bathroom. Really anywhere we don't really want him to be.

Joel says "Hi" in an adorably cute voice while waving his fingers to us all day long. He also greets people that give him eye contact and a smile. 

Joel wants to be wherever all the rest of the kids are. Almost always. No matter what. 

The boys' regular during-the-day activities have come to an end so we've been home most days which has allowed Joel to finally show me the schedule he prefers. Two hours after he wakes up, he's ready for a two (sometimes three!) hour nap. Two (sometimes three) hours after he wakes up, he's ready for a one-and-a-half to two hour nap. About three to four hours after that he's ready for bed. He almost always sleeps 12 hours. His sleeping schedule is reminding me of Ellen's when she was a baby.

He enjoys playing peek-a-boo. (Is it obvious that he waiting for me to come out from behind the camera and "boo" him?)

Goodness in the form of books

Dave's been doing a lot of studying lately. I've been reading a lot of books lately. 

I'm sure I've mentioned multiple times that where fiction is concerned I'm all about the Juve-Lit. I like it light, I like it inspiring, I like it (mostly) drama free.

I've come across a couple of goodies lately.

The Kiki Strike series by Kirsten Miller: The name, the name...I know. But that's the worst part for me. I'm a sucker for a "you have secret powers no one knew about until now" story (cause maybe I have secret powers as yet undiscovered!!! It could happen.) In the Kiki Strike series a group of 12 year olds use their super powers to save the city of New York, time and time again. And the best part, their powers are self-made. One girl has an insane knowledge of New York City thanks to parents who never quit going to school and never stop buying books coupled with a lack of friends and things to do. What else is a jr. higher to do? Read everything, obviously. Another comes from a family of chemists who has spent her childhood playing with chemicals and become a brilliant scientist in her own right. Another's parents are costumers for the New York Opera. She of course is a master of disguise as well as a gifted clothing designer. 

The girls are brought together and eventually form a sort of good guys-ninja group, stopping all sorts of conspiratoral crime and mayhem. Love it.

 

Out of my Mind - Sharon Draper: This one is not the sort I usually pick up cause it's one of those feel-good-makes-you-cry sort of stories. Obviously I didn't realize that when I checked it out. I did notice it when I read two pages, but by then it was too late. I'd already started.

Melody is a fifth grade girl with a photographic memory stuck inside a body plagued with Cerebral Palsy. She can't speak. Can you even imagine being physically helpless and remember everything you've ever been exposed to? Read this one and it will be impossible to not want to chat with every person you come across that she reminds you of.

This week

This last week or so has been sorta nuts. 

Dave's classes are finishing up, so they're ramping up a bit. Instead of every other weekend, he's had class both of these last two weekends. He's been doing a lot of late night studying.

He's also got what the dr thinks is a pinched nerve in his lower back/leg. It's pretty sucky.

Last week we had some friends come to visit. Fun.

About four hours after they left we all got sorta sick and laid around for the rest of the weekend. We all stayed home from everything on Monday too. Well, me and the kids anyway. Tuesday morning it dawned on me that I'd recently been notified that one of the families in our co-op had kids diagnosed with Pertussis. I don't know about where you are - but here in Oregon it's become something of an epidemic. I wasn't too worried cause we've all had those shots, and we just had colds anyway. 

But then I read about the symptoms (which were exactly ours) and decided to call the disease specialist from the Health department who had contacted us all, sorta just to reassure myself I had nothing to worry about. Buuuut, she seemed rather concerned. She calmed down a bit when she learned Joel was just over 1 year old. (I guess anyone under 12 months is at a greater risk when they contract it.)

And so I spoke with our pediatirican too, just in case. When the advice nurse called me back she totally had the "Oh, I'm sure it's fine..." voice until I described our exposure (closed room for five hours or so) and that they'd had lab confirmed cases and that we were now sick. And then she got rather serious. 

She hung up, spoke to the dr, and called back saying all the kids were going on antibiotics immediately. This threw me a little cause we don't really like to do antibiotics and two of the kids weren't even sick at all. Is this really the best course of action? Shouldn't we at least get tested and see if we even have this before we go destroying all of our 'biotics'?

After several phone calls (and about 24 hours) I finally learned that the test is downright horrible and really it's best avoided. It involves a swab inserted in your nose, bent down to the back of your throat. Apparently legs and arms must be restrained. The nurse had had it once 15 years ago and swore she could still feel it. She said the only way she'd ever do it again was if someone was about to kill her dog and this would stop it. 

Okay. Antibiotics for us.

Aaaand, we all got to stay home and go nowhwere for the rest of the week. Just in case we really did have germs, we weren't supposed to infect anyone else. I had to call Ellen's school (that was fun.) and tell them we were keeping her home for a week because she *might* have been secondarily exposed to pertussis. They weren't very excited about that. 

So anyway, we've had a lovely few days here at home doing nothing. I'm only going slightly insane with the need to GET. OUT. NOW. It's actually mostly nice to have no deadline for anything. Want to take alllll day to get your school work done? Sure, whatever. We've got no where to be. Want to refuse to obey and be sent to your bed until you do? No problem. What? Don't want to obey after an hour? No problem. Get comfortable. Still not after two hours? No worries. I've got a book to read and nowhere to go. 

I didn't think we really had it at all, but Joelbaby - who was coughing the worst - got immediately better with antibiotics. That doesn't happen with a cold.  So shoot, maybe. 

And we're all vaccinated. Apparently it's only 75-80% effective. Which is better than nothing. And I guess if you do get it, it's not nearly as bad as if you weren't vaccinated. 

So that's been our fun this week. I have read lots of good books though. That's a plus.

Each of us lives in a mental world of our own making

"..perhaps the most suprising discovery has come from mapping the path information travels from our sense organs to our awareness of the world we live in. Not only are the perceptual areas of the brain involved, so are the ares responsible for our memories, our feelings, our beliefs, and our aspirations. Our minds aren't objectively recording our experience of the world; they're creating it, and that creation is influenced by everything else going on in the brain. Each of us lives in a mental world of our own making."

(emphasis mine)

-"Management Rewired: Why feedback doesn't work and other surprising lessons from the latest brain science" By Charles S. Jacobs

T-ball game

The t-ball games have begun!

 

 

And...my favorite from this round:

"Please, Please, let me catch it. Please."

:)

Five minutes of our lives in which it was sorta sunny, Dave was cleaning out the garage and we were outside.

  

 

I found this video I made a couple years ago...

 

In which Joelbaby may be telling us he'd enjoy a future career in the floral industry

 

(and Oh my word, I have a baby voice. I do I not know this already?)